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Sonic Underground
Head Games (transcript)

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This is a transcript of the Sonic Underground episode, "Head Games".

[The Sonic Underground theme song plays]
Aleena (narrating): Too often, we chase after what looks new and promising. We have to remember that sometimes, the old ways are best.
Sonic: Whoaaa! My tummy's rumbling like one of Manic's drum solos! Yo, sibs. I got the need to feed!
Manic: Yo, give us a hand with all this stuff first!
Sonic: Not to worry, bro. This'll only take uno momento!
Sonia: SONIIIC!
Sonic: [pants] Six chili dogs to go, please! Fully loaded. Can't travel on an empty stomach, you know. [chuckles]
Aleena: Hmmm...
Sonic: [pants] Oh, yeah! We're talkin' a serious sack of chili dogs here!
Aleena: [laughs]
Sonic: [chews and slurps]
Sonia: What took you so long?
Sonic: You can't create a thing of beauty in a hurry! Note the aroma - the succulent blending of chili and hot dog.
Sonia: Ugh, yuck! How can you eat those things?!
Sonic: Fast, like I do everything! [throws the chili dog into his mouth] Yahh! [chews and slurps] [belches]
Sonia: Oh, puh-leeze! Gross me out!
Sonic: Chill, sis, there's only one more and then we're out of here.
Sonia: Hmm.
Sonic: That's either the weirdest chili dog I've ever seen or there's something funny goin' on here. [unravels the bandages] Jump back, Jack! A coconut!
Sonia: Ooh...
Manic: Hey, look! Fan-mail from some nutcase!
Sonia: "You are needed on Speedster Island, Q.A."?
Manic: Q.A.?
Sonia: Huh?
Manic: Queen Aleena! It's a message from Ma! She wants us on Speedster Island!
Sonia: But how? That's in the middle of the South Mobian Sea!
Sonic: Sea? Hmm...
Manic: Take it easy, bro, I can put the van on pontoons. You won't even get your fast feet wet!
Sonic: Er, there's gotta be some other- [a shot blasts him back] [gasps] Whoooaa, ugh! Huh?
Manic and Sonia: [gasps]
Sonic: SWATbots! Sis, bro, time to go! [gets into the van's dome] How about a little road music?
Manic: Get 'em, bro! [sees SWATbots in the mirror] Uh-oh. Everybody hang on!
Sonic: Maybe a cruise isn't so bad. Things are gettin' too hot around here.
Mantu: When can I try, Father? You promised to teach me how to use the net!
Chief: Soon you won't have to fish. We'll have jobs, money to buy things, a new way of life!
Mantu: I don't want a new way of life! We've always been happy here.
Chief: No fish again. The old ways don't provide for us anymore. We must change if we are to survive. [a ship flies overhead] The mainlanders have returned! I must go meet them.
Bartleby: This island will make a wonderful resort for the aristocracy of Robotropolis! [sniffs] Mmmm, just smell that tropical air! It's so quaint and rustic. Of course, the village will have to be relocated. We can't let a few huts take up prime real estate.
Chief: Move the village?
Sleet: Let me present Club Robo, the latest in high-tech beach resorts.
Bartleby: And we'll leave in use the stone heads down by the beach for decoration in the lobby!
Chief: Once, our island was a sanctuary. It provided for all our needs. But now, there are no fish in the lagoons and we cannot even feed ourselves. We... we will have to sell the island.
Mantu: No, Father! You can't sell the island!
Chief: We must, Mantu! We have no choice.
Mantu: But it's our home!
Chief: Mantu!
Sleet: Moving is always tough on the children.
Mantu: [pants] [bats a branch out of the way] Ugh! [pants] [sobs] Why has my father sold out? Why can't it be like when I was little? He was happy then. You guardians protected us in the old days! But now my father doesn't believe you can help. Come, guardians! Your people need you! [nothing happens] [sighs] Maybe you are just a legend. If you won't protect us, who will?
Manic: Dry land, dead ahead!
Sonic: And not a Sonic second too soon!
Manic: Uh-oh. Buttnik patrol!
Sonic: Whoaaa! [strains] [destroys a SWATbot boat] WIPEOUT! [falls into the water] Aaah!
Manic and Sonia: Whooaaaa!
Sonic: Oof!
Manic: Sonic!
Sonia: Where's Sonic? Where is he?!
Manic: Whoa, bro! I thought we were gonna have to look for a new guitar player!
Sonic: Blah! Stop yappin' and pull me to the shore.
Manic and Sonia: [pants]
Sonic: Ugh! Good old land! [kisses]
Mantu: They've come! The guardians!
Sonic: Who are you?
Mantu: The guardian speaks!
Sonic: Hey, wait!
Sonia: Who was that?
Sonic: Beats me. But maybe he knows where we can get some help.
Sonic: Come on. He's gotta be around here somewhere. [Mantu steps on a twig] Uh-oh. There he goes!
Sonia: Come back! We won't hurt you!
Sonic: Maybe he won't be afraid if we play some music.
Manic: Yeeee-haw!
["Take A Chance" plays]
Sonic, Manic and Sonia: [gasps]
Manic: Whoa...
Sonic, Manic and Sonia: [gasps]
Mantu: You're the guardians! I asked you to help us, and you came!
Sonic: Wait a Mobius minute! Guardians? [looks at his statue] Hey, the face is familiar, but we're a lot better lookin'.
Sonia: Maybe this is why Mother sent us that message! [goes to Mantu] Who are you? Why do you need our help?
Mantu: I'm called Mantu. These strangers are buying the island to build their resort. And you've been sent to save us!
Manic: What strangers, Man, er, Mantu?
Mantu: The two who come from Robotnik. The big one, and the one I don't trust.
Sonic: Dingo and Sleet!
Mantu: And the pompous one with all the money.
Manic: Hehe. Sound like anybody you know, sis?
Sonia: Bartleby!
Mantu: He wants to tear down our village and build his resort!
Chief: Mantu!
Everyone: [gasps]
Mantu: My father! Quick, hide!
Chief: I knew you'd be here, son. I'm sorry, Mantu. I always thought you'd be head man after me, and would serve the stone heads. But things change... You'll see, life will be better for us! We'll have jobs, all the good things Robotnik promised us!
Mantu: I hope you're right, Father.
Sonic: They're gone!
Sonia: Bartleby's mine! I'll make him see how he's hurting these people. [Sonic rushes in front] Huh?
Sonic: You're not goin' without me!
Manic: I'm stickin' around here. There's somethin' familiar about these carvings.
Sonic: Yeah, like you can read ancient Speedonian(!) Let's go, sis.
Sleet: The villagers are ready to sell.
Robotnik: Good!
Sleet: And I must say sir, scaring away their fish was a nice touch! They are starving!
Robotnik: I like to think of myself as an artist in my own way. Watch Bartleby. If he finds out I plan to roboticize the villagers as soon as the deal is signed, he could cause trouble.
Sleet: Don't worry! I've got Dingo on it right now.
Sonic: I'll say one thing about Bartleby - he sure knows how to travel in style!
Sonia: Someone's coming!
Sonic: In here!
Bartleby: I can't wait to get the resort built. I'm so sick of roughing it! [yawns] I hope I can sleep in these primitive conditions.
Sonic: Hey!
Sonic and Sonia: Huh? [gets pushed back into the clothes] Argh! Uh!
Bartleby: Whuh? Stop that, you stupid machine! [turns around] Oh!
Sonic: Hi, big boy!
Sonia: Bartleby...!
Bartleby: Sonia! What are you doing here?!
Sonia: You can't build the resort, Bartleby.
Bartleby: I'm bringing these peasants into the lap of luxury!
Sonic: Yeah, luxury Buttnik style! [falls down] Oww! [walks over to an armchair, which grabs him] Whooaa!
Bartleby: Huh?
Sonia: [gasps]
Dingo: Got him, Sleet! I got him!
Sonic: [strains]
Sleet: Get the hedgehogs! They have interfered for the last time!
Bartleby: [gasps]
Sonic: [strains]
Sonic: [strains] Let me go!
Dingo: Yooowww!
Sonic: Overgrown lounge booger!
Dingo: Oof! Ugh!
Sonic: All right, it's juice and jam time!
Dingo: [grunts]
Sleet: Get them!
Sonic, Sonia and Bartleby: [gasps]
Dingo: Raaaargh!
Sonic, Sonia and Bartleby: [gasps]
Dingo: Huh? [falls into the closet] Whooaaa, ugh!
Bartleby: [gasps]
Sonic and Sonia: Uhh!
Sonic: Sonia, let's go!
Bartleby: [gasps]
Sleet: I don't care if we have to destroy the whole village! I WANT THOSE HEDGEHOGS! [Dingo emerges from the closet] This is no time for dress-up, Dingo! After them!
Manic: Oh, man! These carvings aren't words at all. [his siblings arrive] Huh? Hey, what's shakin'? You look like you got an army of SWATbots on your tail.
Sonic: That's because we got an army of SWATbots on our-
Mantu: Take me with you! [trips over a rock] Whoa, ugh! I can't stay here.
Sonic and Sonia: Huh?
Mantu: Not after my father betrayed us all!
Sonic: Whatever your dad's done, he's done it because he cares about you.
Mantu: You believe that?
Sonic, Manic and Sonia: Mm-hmm!
Mantu: Maybe I should try, too! [a rumbling is heard] [gasps]
Sonic: The village!
Manic and Sonia: [gasps]
Mantu: Father!
Manic: Hey, wait! I meant to tell you, y'know, those carvings?
[villagers panic as they flee]
Chief: Quick, into the jungle!
Sleet: Now this is what I call urban renewal!
Dingo: [cackles]
Bartleby: Sleet, what's going on? We haven't actually bought the island yet!
Sleet: Details... besides, Robotnik wants those people roboticized anyway. A good resort needs waiters and bellhops who'll do what they're told.
Dingo: And Robotnik doesn't tip!
Bartleby: You can't do that!
Sleet: Watch me. Round up all the villagers! I want them roboticized!
[villagers panic and scream]
Chief: [pants] How could they do this? It wasn't part of the bargain! [his headdress is sheared by a blaster] Urgh!
Sonic: [gasps] Get the villagers away! We'll see if we can hold off Buttnik's bots.
[villagers panic]
Sonic: Now!
Sonic, Manic and Sonia: [strains]
Sonic: Those bots are trash! [another shot fires] Whoaaa!
Sonia: Aaah!
Manic: Ahh! Yeah, but there's a lot more where those came from! [runs away and falls down] Ugh! What's up with this?
Sonia: [strains]
Sonic: [gasps] Dingo!
Sleet: Creepy... isn't it?
Sonic: Manic, Sonia! Our medallions!
Manic and Sonia: [strains]
Mantu: LET THEM GO!
Sleet: Huh? Hehe...
Mantu: Ayayayayay! [a SWATbot grabs him] Put me down, you-
Sleet: You little troublemaker! It will be a pleasure to roboticize you.
Chief: Ah-aah-aah-aah-aah!
Mantu: Father!
Sleet: Aargh!
Chief: Eeeyaah!
Sleet: Noooo!
Dingo: Whooaa!
Manic: Sonic, Sonia! The carvings! They're musical notes. All we have to do is play!
Chief: Huh?
Mantu: The guardians! They're real!
Sleet and Dingo: Aaarrgh!
Bartleby: Aaahhh!
Sleet and Dingo: Aargh!
Sleet, Dingo and Bartleby: Aaaaarrrrgh!
Sleet: Argh!
Dingo: Help!
Bartleby: Mom-seh! [rises from the water after the crash] Gah! [pants] You idiots! You've cost us the resort and now we're stuck without even a paddle.
Dingo: Huh?
Sonic: They won't be back.
Manic: If they do, just play those three notes, and the guardians'll start stompin' butt!
Chief: Thank you for finding the guardians' secret. Mantu, I was wrong to try to sell the island.
Mantu: You were only doing what you thought was best.
[villagers cheer and yell]
Sonic: You did good, bro. But now how do we get outta here? The van is shark bait!
Manic: Not a problem, bro! I think I've got it covered.
[everyone cheers]
Manic: You gotta hand it to those guardians! Those are some stone-cool dudes!
[The credits roll]
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