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The best thing since pie, Swedish Chef reads a Ken Penders article from TSSZ http://www.tssznews.com/2013/03/27/archie-fighting-proposed-dismissal-of-penders-copyright-case/

Swedish Chef and Ken Penders

Ercheee-a Cumeecs is in sereeuoos dunger ooff hefeeng its levsooeet egeeenst furmer Suneec cumeecs vreeter Kee Penders deesmissed, putenteeelly mekeeng a bed seetooeshun fur funs ooff zee sereees und thuse-a infulfed veet its prudoocshun vurse-a.

Cuoonsel fur Penders hefe-a reqooested zee cese-a be-a deesmissed oon zee besees ooff a effffurmeshun dooreeng a Junooery stetoos cunfference-a thet but perteees egreed tu settlement terms, es vell es un indeeceshun frum Reecherd Bermun, zee joodge-a ooferseeeeng zee cese-a, thet zee metter vuoold be-a deesmissed effter Junooery 21st nu metter vhet, eccurdeeng tu poobleec ducooments feeled veet zee US Deestrict Cuoort fur zee Suoozeern Deestrict ooff Noo Yurk oon Mundey und oobteeened by TSSZ. Boot cuoonsel fur Ercheee-a hefe-a deespooted zee cleeem thet uny settlement is ooffffeeciel, und hefe-a feeled un indursed letter in zee cese-a urgeeng joodge-a Bermun tu deny Penders’s reqooest. Um de hur de hur de hur.

“Ve-a soobmeet thet thees cuoort mey nut deesmiss thees ecshun ‘veet prejoodeece-a,’ es reqooested by Mr. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Penders’ cuoonsel. Thees vuoold inepprupreeete-a [seec] und greetly prejoodeeciel tu ECP’s interests, seence-a ECP hes nut hed a fooll und feur ooppurtooneety tu leetigete-a in thees pruceedeeng uny ooff zee issooes thet ere-a reeesed in zee perteees’ pleedeengs,” vreetes ECP etturney Jushooa Pool in hees letter tu zee cuoort. Um de hur de hur de hur.

Pool’s letter elleges thet but Penders und Ercheee-a “cunclooded un understundeeng ooff zee beseec peremeters ooff settlement dooreeng a medeeeshun sesseeun held oon Nufember 29, 2012 und redooced thet understundeeng tu feefe-a deel pueents cufereeng 15 leenes ooff text in a seegned Term Sheet. Um de hur de hur de hur.” Boot es ve-a repurted in December, a letter frum Pool deed use-a mure-a cuncrete-a lungooege-a in cleeeming “zee perteees reeched egreement oon zee terms ooff settlement. Um de hur de hur de hur.”

Cuoonsel fur Penders esserts thet is inuoogh, und ceetes zee trunscreept ooff zee Junooery stetoos cunfference-a betveee but seedes. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Zee trunscreept shoos un irreeteted joodge-a Bermun tryeeng tu understund vhy it’s tekee su lung fur zee settlement tu be-a feenelized. Bork bork bork! In oone-a ixchunge-a, Bermun eppeers tu sculd Pool fur zee deley: Pool seeed zee ixchunge-a thet “zee cure-a ooff zee egreement veell be-a in schedooles” und thet settleeng thees metter “is zee must impurtunt theeng thet [Ercheee-a] is deeleeng veet reeght noo, is tu get reed ooff thees leetigeshun.”

Joodge-a Bermun thun eppeered tu set a deedleene-a ooff Junooery 21st, “et vheech teeme-a I’m gueeng tu deesmiss zee cese-a,” incloodeeng cuoontercleeems, eccurdeeng tu zee trunscreept. Um de hur de hur de hur.

Boot Junooery 21st hes cume-a und gune-a veet nu settlement feenelized. Bork bork bork! Pool’s letter oon behelff ooff Ercheee-a elleges zeere-a is oone-a metter steell in deespoote-a; it eppeers tu be-a zee ixtent ooff vheech Penders’s cupyreeghted cherecters cun eppeer leeke-a a Suneec cherecter–in ooff itselff a vhule-a oozeer cun ooff legel vurms:

A metereeel term ooff settlement infulfed zee scupe-a ooff Mr. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Penders’ cleeem ooff reeghts tu ixplueet certeeen cleeemed prupreeetery reeghts in zee footoore-a. Poorsoount tu zee Term Sheet, Mr. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Penders’ esserted reeghts [....] iff ixplueeted by Penders in zee footoore-a, vuoold nut “luuk und feel leeke-a zeey ere-a a pert ooff a ‘Suneec Uneeferse-a.’

[....]

Zee perteees hefe-a ettempted veethuoot sooccess tu reech egreement oon zee metes und buoonds ooff Mr. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Penders’ Cleeemed Reeghts (Schedoole-a A). In zee ebsence-a ooff egreement oon thees key pueent, zeere-a cun be-a nu egreement betveee zee perteees. Um gesh dee bork, bork!

In a nootshell, etturneys fur Penders hupe-a tu huld Joodge-a Bermun tu hees vurd oon deesmissing zee cese-a, vhezeer zeere-a’s a settlement in plece-a oor nut. Um de hur de hur de hur. Iff thet heppens und nu terms ere-a in plece-a, Penders vuoold reteeen tutel cupyreeght cuntrul oofer zee metters in deespoote-a veet Ercheee-a, incloodeeng sume-a cherecters, sturyleenes, und mure-a–mekeeng it fery deefffficoolt fur Ercheee-a tu cunteenooe-a veet cetelug releeses, oor breenging beck cherecters veedely beleeefed tu be-a poorged in Suneec #244 beck tu zee sereees. Um gesh dee bork, bork! A deesmissel veet prejoodeece-a vuoold nut elloo Ercheee-a tu reffeele-a zee levsooeet egeeen. Bork bork bork!

It cuoold elsu becume-a a neeghtmere-a fur but Sega und Ilectruneec Erts. Um gesh dee bork, bork! Yuoo mey remember thet Penders feeled a sooeet in 2011 egeeenst but cumpuneees, ellegeeng metereeel under hees cupyreeght ves used in Suneec Chruneecles: Zee Derk Bruzeerhuud. Bork bork bork! Thet cese-a ves deesmissed boot eppeeled tu zee 9t Curcooeet; zee ooootcume-a ooff zee Ercheee-a metter mey determeene-a hoo fer thees seperete-a sooeet cun gu. Hefeeng a vhule-a set ooff tested, undeespooted cupyreeghts intect vuoold be-a un incredeeble-a edfuntege-a fur Penders egeeenst Sega und IA, und cuoold putenteeelly cust but cumpuneees deerly iff zeey huld a secund teeme-a.

Joodge-a Bermun hes reqooested breeeffs by next veek. Vhee ve-a knoo sumetheeng mure-a ebuoot thees cese-a, ve-a veell pess it elung.

Bork Bork Bork!--IceSeason101 (talk) 23:00, August 5, 2014 (UTC)