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Inspired by the well-known blog Tip of the Day, this blog involves funny moments with the Green Bolt himself, Statyx the Hedgehog. Of course, there's one big difference: These moments have no lesson or morals! That's right, just plain old comedy involving Statyx, his friends, rivals, and maybe even enemies.

  • Note: I plan on using several characters in this, both real and fanon. I plan on making (good-natured) fun of characters, so if anyone finds the use of their character offensive in any way, please tell me, and I will remedy the situation immediately.

Episode 1

[Statyx is walking with Blaze, spots Shadow]
Statyx: Hey Shadow!
Shadow: Oh, hey Staty-!
Kit: *grabs Shadow* Shadzy! I thought you said we were going on a date today?
Shadow: Oh uh, er, that is to say...
Statyx: *chuckes* Hey Shadow, what's that saying? Bros before...
Kit: *growls*
Statyx: Girlfriends. Geez, what did you think I was gonna say?
Blaze: Something much more appropriate.
Kit: What did you just say!?
Blaze: You heard me!
Kit: Grrr, Ahhhh!
[Blaze and Kit attack each other]
Shadow: Hey we should do something!
Statyx: *blocks Shadow* Yeah, but how often do we see two Cat-girls having a catfight?
Shadow: True.
[Statyx and Shadow sit down and watch]

Episode 2

Statyx: *Wakes up* Whoa, that was some party. *looks around, sees house in shambles* [whistles] I guess this what happens when everyone has a suger rush. Where is everybody anyway?
Shadow: *falls from ceiling* Oh man, what was I doing on the ceiling fan?
Statyx: I don't remember. Though I swear I recall someone declaring love for a Cat of some kind.
Shadow: *blushes*
Statyx: *looks around* Hey, where's Shelly? She helped us plan this party, she should help clean up!
Shadow: Hey, why's your TV on?
Statyx: *gets up* I don't know. But, might as well catch the morning news.
[Statyx turns the TV to the News, which shows an orange blur, followed by a large dust cloud]
Statyx: No way...
Shadow: Oh please yes.
Reporter: And now, to catch everyone up, we are now on our 6th hour observing what seems to be a Clementine hedgehog in its birthday suit, running at speeds of sound.
Statyx: Well, now we know where Shelly is.
Shadow: *Bursts into laughter*
Reporter: The police have long since given up catching this hedgehog, and now the militaries fastest planes are currently being called in.
Statyx: Well, better go catch her before she does something stupid.
Reporter: On the one occasion we were able to get close enough to hear the hedgehog, it stated that it was looking for it's parents, the "Pink Bur" and the "Blue Bezerker".
Statyx: Too late.
Shadow: AHAHA!! Can't....breath...AHA!
Statyx: Well, come on Shadow, we better go help her.
Shadow: And why would I help her, when she's never gonna live this down?
Statyx: Because, while she might never live this down, you will never live it down if she gets her hands on all the dirt I have on you.
Shadow: I hate you.
Statyx: Get in line.

Episode 3

[Statyx is walking along the sidewalk.]
[flower vase nearly falls on Statyx]
Statyx: Whoa! *looks up*
Citizen: Sorry!
Statyx: It's good! This stuff happens alot!
[Statyx keeps walking along the sidewalk]
Statyx: *hears whistling sound, sighs, and sidesteps*
[A safe falls where Statyx just was]
Statyx: *smug smile, chuckles* Way too easy.
[Statyx takes a few steps, but looks down]
Statyx: Whoa! *jumps into the road to avoid piano, which lands with a crash* This day is not gonna end well.
Driver: Hey! Get out of the road!
Statyx: *narrowly avoids car* Sorry!
[Several drivers attempt to avoid Statyx]
Statyx: Whoa! Sorry! Excuse me! My apologies! *jumps to avoid car, which hits another car*
Statyx: Oh boy, here we go.
[Several carse pile-up]
Statyx: *pops up, checks self* I don't believe it, I'm completely unscathed! *raises fist yells to the air* Take that Lady Luck! I've finally beaten you!
[A large shadow covers Statyx]
Statyx: *pupils shrink* Mother.
[A large whale lands on Statyx]
Whale: Whooooaaaaaahhh!
Statyx: *muffled* OH COME ON!!!!

Episode 4

[Statyx is walking with Shadow and Shelly]
Shadow: Oh be quiet you monkey!
Shelly: I'm not a monkey, you emo-alien!
Shadow: What did you call me!?
Shelly: You heard me!
Statyx: Oh will you two just shut up already!?
Shelly: Who's gonna make us!?
Shadow: You?
Statyx: Good idea. *grabs Shadow and Shelly's faces, shocks them*
Shadow: Wooohaaaa
Shelly: Can I get some ketchup with my tea?
Both: *fall over, K.O.'ed*
Statyx: Finally, now I can get some peace and quiet *walks away*
[A few hours later, Statyx is sitting in a tree]
Statyx: Ahhh, peace and quiet!
Shadow & Shelly: STAAAAATYYYYYYX!!!!! *two Chaos Blasts head for Statyx*
Statyx: Ahhhhh!
[the tree Statyx is in is blown up. Statyx pops up]
Statyx: *spits out leaves* Of course. They won't work together to save the world, but they'll work as a team to try and blow me up. Typical.

Episode 5

[Spike Renzar is hitting on Blaze]
Spike: C'mon, just one date?
Blaze: No. I have a boyfriend!
Spike: So? How's he gonna find out?
[Someone taps on Spike's shoulder]
Spike: *turns around* Alright, what do you.....oh boy.
Statyx: *cracking knuckles*
[A bunch of electricity is seen]
Spike: AHHHHHHH!!! *K.O.'ed, charred hand mark on face*
[Later]
Spike: How about we go to a park?
Blaze: No thank you!
Spike: Why not?
Statyx: Hello.
Spike: Yipe!
[more electricity is seen]
Spike: AHHHHHHH!!! *K.O.'ed again, hand mark on face*
[Even later]
Spike: How about some lunch?
Blaze: Not hungry.
Spike: But......he's behind me isn't he?
Blaze: Yup.
Stayx: Yup!
Spike: Oh no.
[electricity is seen again]
Spike: AHHHHHH!!! *K.O.'ed yet again, hand mark on face, twitching*
Statyx: Now, STAY AWAY FROM MY GIRLFRIEND!! Geez, I thought most cats were supposed to be smart. I guess no one's evr met him!

Episode 6

[Spike is hitting on Blaze yet again]
Blaze: Will you just give it up already?
Spike: Not until I get a date.
[Statyx walks up]
Statyx: *grabs Spike* You're coming with me!
Spike: Uh, okay. Seeya later Blaze!
Statyx: No you won't!
Spike: Okay.
[later]
Statyx: *puts Spike up* Alright Spike, what do I have to do to get you to stay away from Blaze!?
Spike: Well, Blaze is a beautiful girl...
Statyx: Come on! I'll do anything!
Spike: Anything?
Statyx: If it'll get you to stop hitting on Blaze, yes!
Spike: Then here's what I want....
[Later, Shelly is seen walking into a resteurant.]
Shelly: Gee, Jezz sounds realy serious in this note. *blushes* He also sounds really romantic! So, where's my table?
Spike: Ahem!
Shelly: *sees Spike in a tux with a big smile* What's going on here?
Statyx: *walks up in waiter uniform* It's the only way I could get him to stay away from Blaze, alright?
Shelly: GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!
[The front of the resteurant is shown.]
Shelly: GRAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
[A huge explosion. Statyx is seen sent flying]
Statyx: Ahhhhhh!!!! *lands in a dumpster* *pops up* Ouch. Well, at least Spike will stay away from Blaze now.
Spike: *slapping noises are heard* *sent flying into dumpster* *pops up, several red, pulsing flyswatter marks on his face* Owwwwww! Well, guess it's back to hitting on Blaze!
Statyx: Hey, we had a deal! I get you a date with Shelly, you stop hitting on Blaze!
Spike: Buddy, if that counted as a date, I've had thousands of them! *starts climbing out of dumpster*
Statyx: Grrrr! *grabs Spike's tail, pulls him back into dumpster*
Spike: Ahhh!
[Dumpster closes, then rocks and shakes with pounding noises heard and bulges coming out of it. After a few seconds, electric light is seen from the slight crack of an opening*
Spike: AHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Statyx: *climb out* Man, the worst part is that I deserved that boot to the butt! *walks away rubbing butt*
Spike: *pops up* Woooooaaaaaaaaooooohhhhh.....
[Dumpster top falls down, hitting Spike with a bang]
Spike: Doh!

Episode 7

[Statyx is sitting in a tree]
Statyx: .........
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Statyx: Alright, it's way too quiet! Something should've happened by-
[Piano falls on Statyx]
Statyx: ....why does Lady Luck hate me?  

Episode 8

[Satatyx and Sharna hiding behind bush]
Sharna: You sure this'll work?
Statyx: Trust me, it'll-hold on, here he comes!
Shadow: *walking along, spots something* Hey, is that what I think it is? *looks closer* It is! A Chaos Emerald! *grabs it, rope tightens around wrist* Oh crud.
[the rope slingshots Shadow towards a branch, and spins him around it several times before throwing him into the air. A catapault suddenly launches a ball of gunk at Shadow]
Shadow: Ha! Chaos Control! *nothing happens* What? Chaos-Oh boy.
[gunk hits Shadow with a splat. Shadow falls to the ground, hitting a switch that fires paintballs at him]
Shadow: *dazed, holds up Chaos Emerald* Chaos Control, Chaos Control! *emerald cracks, then explodes, releasing brown gunk*
Sharna: Ha! That was too good! And the exploding chocolate Emerald was a nice touch.
Statyx: Well, you did pay me 10 bucks for it.
Sharna: Well, if you excuse me. *turns around, steps on a handle that slams a pie-shaped piece of brown gunk onto Sharna's face*
Statyx: And Shadow paid me 15 bucks for that.
Sharna: ....Please tell me this is chocolate.
Statyx: I can assure you..... it is not. *bursts into laughter*
Shadow & Sharna: STAAAAAAAATYYYYYYYX!!!!!! *both leap at him*
Statyx: Whoops! Time to go! *Chaos Controls away*
Shadow and Sharna: *heads hit each other* Dohhhahhhhh. *Boxing match bell*
Statyx: *Sitting on branch* Looks like a double knock-out for the Green Bolt! *bursts into laughter again*

Episode 9

[Shadow and Shelly are in a weapons store]
Shadow: *examining a weapon* Hm, this one looks interesting.
Shelly: *groan* Why am I here!?
Shadow: Because you broke the other one playing with it...
Shelly: I swear I used to be a darker shade of orange.
Shadow: And you lost the bet. *goes back to examining weapon* Hmm, maybe I should see what Statyx thinks of this.
Shelly: I still can't believe that Shadow beat me! In a chili-dog eating contest no less! I thought Statyx hated guns?
Shadow: Doesn't mean he doesn't know how they work.
[A huge explosion is heard outside, shaking the store. Shadow is unfazed, but Shelly is visibly surprised]
Shelly: Whoa! What was that!!??
Shadow: Most likely the thunder-dud and silver-psycho fighting.
Shelly: Really? *looks out window, sees large amounts of smoke and dust, with blasts of electricity and pulses of psychokinesis flying everywhere* Geez, and people say we're bad with each other!
Shadow: *Looks out window* You got that right monkey, they would kill each other if you gave them the-incoming!!
[Shadow and Shelly duck as Silver is blasted through the window and into a wall]
Silver: *gets up* You're gonna have to do better than that thunder-dud! *charges back outside*
Shadow & Shelly: *look outside, grin evily, then look at each other*
Shadow: Tell me monkey, did we actually have the same idea?
Shelly: Maybe so. Oh, and I AM NOT A MONKEY!!!
[Back outside, Statyx and Silver are still fighting]
Statyx: Take this silver-psycho! *attacks with a Thunder Beam, but misses*
Silver: Try this thunder-dud! *sends out a pulse of psychokinesis, but misses*
Statyx: That's it, I'm finishing this! *charges head-on at Silver*
Silver: Funny, I was thinking the same! *charges at Statyx*
[Before the two make contact, they hear a crunching noise. They look over to see Shadow and Shelly sitting in chairs and eating popcorn]
Statyx: Uhhh, what are you guys doing?
Shelly: *mouth full of popcorn* Enjoying the view.
Silver: Uhh, why?
Shadow: Oh come on, like you guys don't watch when we fight.
Statyx: Yeah, but we don't get chairs and eat popcorn while watching!
Silver: Yeah! That's just plain, disrespectful!
Shadow: Oh calm down you silver-psycho.
Silver: *angry growl*
Statyx: *chuckles*
Shelly: You too thunder-dud, loosen up a bit.
Statyx: *angry growl*
Silver: *snickers*
Shelly: Yeah, and maybe you could stop trying to kill each other everyday. Of course, that would happen the same time Knuckles and Rouge admit they like each other!
Shadow & Shelly: *start laughing*
Statyx & Silver: *growl, look at each other, grin evily, start walking towards Shadow and Shelly*
Shelly: Uh, what are you guys doing?
Statyx: Payback.
Shadow & Shelly: *pupils shrink, ears droop*
[Everyone is then found at the hospital, with Shadow and Shelly in full-body casts, a doctor enters the room]
Doctor: Tsk, tsk, tsk. I expect better from you two Shadow and Shelly. You guys may come here often, but never in a condition like this, both of you no less!
Statyx: What can we say?
Silver: They have no self-control.
Shadow & Shelly: *shake furiously, yells muffled by the casts*
Statyx: Oh be quiet! *flicks the two on their feet*
Shadow & Shelly: *pupils shrink*
[The outside of the hospital is shown]
Shadow & Shelly: YEEEEOOOOWWWW!!!!!!

Episode 10

[Amy is walking down the sidewalk, when she sees Statyx and Echo coming along, arguing]
Amy: *giggle* What's the happy couple arguing about?
Both: WE ARE NOT A COUPLE!!!!
Statyx: I ALREADY HAVE A GIRLFRIEND AMY!!! Or have you forgotten about Blaze!?
Amy: Okay okay, I was just kidding. So, what are you guys arguing about?
Echo: Sparky's been interfering in my love life.
Statyx: As if you have one.
Echo: What was that?
Statyx: Nothing, nothing. And besides, I was just trying to help you out.
Amy: Yeah Echo. Statyx is a romantic, so he knows this stuff.
Echo: Well, I don't need any helping.
Statyx: Well, I woulda thought you'd be happy I set you up on a date with Sonic-ooph!! *covers mouth, pupils shrink*
Amy: *eyes closed, still smiling, turns to Statyx* What was that, Statyx?
Echo: *snickers* Yeah, Statyx tried to set me up with Sonic. *leans over to Amy* Say, don't you like him?
Amy: *edge of mouth twitches*
Statyx: *eyes flick from Amy to Echo* *points at Echo* ECHO HAS A CRUSH ON SONIC!!!!!
Echo: *face turns red* STATYX!!!!!!
Statyx: Hey if I'm going down I'm taking you with me!!!
Amy: Whhyyyyyy YOOOOUUUU!!!!!
Statyx: Look out she's gonna blow!!!! *blasts off*
Echo: *watching Statyx run off* Oh come on, what's the worst she... can... do? *looks down, sees a shadow covering her, looks up* *pupils shrink* That's a big hammer.
[10 minutes later]
Echo: *hiding behind a rock, breathing heavily* Geez, that girl is nuts!!
[Statyx is seen clutching to a branch in a nearby tree, his whole body shaking]
Statyx: Why do you think I'm scared of her? She's a freakin psychopath!!!
Amy: THERE YOU ARE!!!
Statyx: RUN FOR IT!!!!
Echo & Statyx: *blast off at max speed*
Amy: GET BACK HERE YOU TWO!!!!!
Statyx: *shouts back* Not a chance!!!
Amy: Grrrrrrr! *picks up a rock and throws it at the two*
Echo: Oof!
Statyx: Hah-ha!
Echo: *hits Statyx on the head*
Statyx: Ow!!

Episode 11

[Statyx is walking along a sidewalk]
Statyx: *humming*
[A small, hard ball lightly hits Statyx in the back of the head]
Statyx: Huh? *turns around, picks up ball* Hey, who's ball is this? *looks around, doesn't see anyone* Huh, weird. *turns back around, tosses ball over shoulder*
[A ball suddenly hits Statyx on the forehead]
Statyx: Oop! *rubs forehead, looks down, picks up ball* What the? Didn't I just toss this? *looks around* Okaayy. *turns around, skips ball along the ground*
[A ball hits Statyx in the back of the leg]
Statyx: Ow! *turns around, sees ball* Okay, this is getting annoying. *picks up ball, throws it*
[a ball hits Statyx in the back of the head]
Statyx: Ohw! *holds back of head, turns around, picks up ball* Grrr! *turns around, bounces ball off the sidewalk*
[A ball bounces on the sidewalk and hits Statyx in the butt]
Statyx: Ow! *turns around, picks up ball, stares at it* ..... *crushes ball* Heheh.
[Statyx walks along the sidewalk, when a ball fallonto head]
Statyx: Doh! Grrrr! *picks up ball, throws ball into sidewalk, leaving a hole* Ha!
[A ball falls from the sky and hits Statyx on the head]
Statyx: Ooww! *looks around* WHO KEEPS DOING THAT!!??
[Sunny and Silver are seen on a rooftop, with a box full of identical balls near them]
Sunny: HAHA!! This is great!
Silver: See, I told you this would be a great idea for a date!
[two hands grab Sunny and Silver's shoulders. Sunny and Silver freeze up]
Statyx: *anime evil face* What is a good idea for a date?
Sunny & Silver: *shakily turn their heads to Statyx*
[Sunny and Silver are seen frantically running away]
Sunny: I thought you said he wouldn't figure it out!
Silver: Less talking, more running!
Statyx: Grrrrr! *grabs two balls, throws them at Sunny & Silver*
Sunny & Silver: Ow!!
Statyx: Ha! That'll teach 'em!
[Another ball is thrown at Statyx]
Statyx: Ow! *picks up ball, looks in direction ball was thrown from, growling*
Tawny: *hiding behind tree, snickering*
[A thunder Beam is launched at the tree, destroying it]
Tawny: *pops up from the rubble, coughs up smoke* Geez, you'd think Statyx would be able to take a joke.
*rimshot*

Episode 12

[Statyx is seen dragging Mystic by his tail]
Mystic: Let go of my tail!!!
Statyx: No! There's someone I want you to meet!
Mystic: Who!!??
Statyx: Wait, there she is!
[Shelly is seen sitting on a bench]
Statyx: *waves to Shelly* Hey Shelly!
Shelly: *spots Statyx, waves back* Hey Statyx! What do you have there?
Statyx: *prps Mystic up* This is my pal Mystic! I thought you two should meet.
Shelly: Oh. Well hello Mystic.
Mystic: Hmph!
Shelly: Well, aren't you polite.
Mystic: Well excuse me, I was just dragged here against my will!
Shelly: Hey, what are you yelling at me for!?
[Shelly and Mystic start growling, when Statyx comes between them]
Statyx: Hey hey hey! Rather than kill each other, why not try and get along?
Mystic: Forget it, we obviously have nothing in common.
Shelly: I couldn't have said it better.
Statyx: Well, let's see. Hmmm, Favorite color?
Shelly: Orange.
Mystic: Seafoam green.
Statyx: Okay then. Favorite food?
Shelly: Chili dogs.
Mystic: Bananas.
Statyx: Dang. Uhhh, favorite activity?
Shelly: Making fun of Shadow.
Mystic: Training.
Statyx: Okay okay... least favorite person?
Shelly: Shadow.
Mystic: Eggman.
Statyx: Yeah, figured as much. Well, might as well wrap this up. Well geez, you two should have a lot in common!
Shelly: Oh?
Mystic: How so?
Statyx: *grins* Well, you two are both...
Shelly: *pupils shrink, looks angrily at Statyx* Don't you even....
Mystic: This oughtta be good.
Statyx: .....Rodents!!
Shelly: *bewildered look on face* Wha?
Mystic: *pupils shrink, snapping noise is heard* WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME!!??
Statyx: *falls to the floor laughing* I've been waiting to do that all day!!
Mystic: ....you mean you dragged me hear just to call me a rat!!??
Shelly: *smug smile* Actually, all he called you was a rodent, which is actually kinda true for hedgehogs.
Mystic: SHUT UP!!
Statyx: Oh calm down Mystic. *pulls out package* Here, it's a peace offering.
Mystic: *takes package* Oh, well, thanks. *opens package, which holds a slice of cheese*
Statyx: *falls to the ground* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Shelly: *chuckles*
Mystic: *smooshes cheese, pulls out sword* THAT'S IT, IT'S GO TIME!!!!
Statyx: *starts running, with Mystic chasing him* *still laughing* Aw come on!! Have a sense of humor Mystic!!
Mystic: NOT UNTIL I HAVE YOUR HEAD!!!
Shelly: *watches* Well, at least for once I wasn't called a-
Shadow: *walks up* Hey Monkey.
Shelly: I AM NOT A MONKEY!!!!!

Episode 13

[Statyx is walking along, and spots the Chaotix, who are hiding behind a bush]

Statyx: *walks up* Do I even wanna know?
[The Chaotix jump, then turn around, spot Statyx, and relax]
Vector: Uhh, h-hey Statyx.
Statyx: What are you guys doing?
Espio: None of your business.
Statyx: ....*turns to Charmy* Charmy?
Charmy: We're watching Cream's house waiting for Vanilla to come out so Vector can ask her ut.
Vector: Charmy!
Charmy: Oops, sorry.
Espio: *facepalms* Idiot.
Statyx: *chuckles* Is that so?
Vector: You gotta help me out Statyx. Nothing we've tried has worked!
Statyx: Did you use the same tactics you tried with Tails and Cosmo?
Vector: Yeah, and several other plans.
Statyx: Okay, I can see what happened. Let the real romantic handle this.
Vector: Thanks man, you're a life-saver!
Espio: Maybe he'll actually get somewhere.
[Statyx walks up to the house and knocks on the door. Vanilla opens the door]
Vanilla: Oh, hello Statyx. What are you doing here?
Statyx: *takes a breath* Vector has been trying to ask you out all day but he doesn't have the back-bone to ask you to your face, so I'm asking for him. Would you like to go on a date with Vector?
[The Chaotix watch from behind the bushes, their eyes wide and mouths open]
Vanilla: *chuckles softly* Sure, I'd love to.
[The Chaotix's eye widen, pupils shrink, and their jaws open even wider]
Statyx: Great. So, seven-ish?
Vanilla: That'd be perfect.
Statyx: Great! I'll tell Vector.
[Statyx turns around and walks away, towards the Chaotix]
Statyx: Pick up your jaw Vector *closes Vector's mouth* you've got a date tonight. *continues walking*
Vector: *falls to the ground and faints*
Espio: Why didn't we do that in the first place?
Charmy: .......Wait a minute! I said we should do that in the first place!
Espio: What, get Statyx's help?
Charmy: Nooo, have Vector just ask Vanilla out on a date!

Episode 14

[Statyx is seen sitting down, simply reading. Kamal, Tennah, Gear, and G300F enter the house]
Kamal: Hey Statyx, what's up?
Statyx: *reading*
Gear: ......Dude?
Generic: *runs up* W00t! W00t! Wut's up dudez?
Kamal: *groans, rolls eyes* What do you want Generic?
Statyx: *reading*
Generic: Yo dude, wanna fight? I waz a god once!
Statyx: *reading*
Generic: ........U Ok dude?
Kamal: We don't know what's up with him.
Statyx: *reading*
Generic: O boy, o boy! Evrybody, Statyx is ded!!
Gear: Calm down you idiot.
Statyx: *reading*
Generic: AHHHH!!!! W00t! W00t! W00t!! *runs around in a panic*
Tennah: *slaps Generic* He ain't dead! Look!
Statyx: *reading, turns page*
Generic: O. Hey, wanna make out?
Tennah: *slaps Generic again*
Generic: .......I'm gonna go play outside! *runs outside*
[Statyx continues to read. After a while, explosions are heard. People run in a panic, screaming. Polic sirens blare. Police officers are heard shouting, and soon enough, numerous shots are heard all over the place. Statyx continues reading throughout the entire event. Generic walks in, severely beaten and burnt. Kamal, Gear, Tennah, and G300FF look at him in shock]
Generic: I'm gunna go 2 bed. *walks off*
[The Power Ring Staff look at Statyx, who is still calmly reading]
Kamal: Really, we would have killed him by now!
G300FF: 3 times by my calculation.
Tennah: How do you just ignore him!?
[Suddenly, another explosion is heard, and Shadow is seen chasing Shelly]
Shadow: Get back here you stinkin monkey!!
Shelly: I'M NOT A MONKEY!!! *earthquake*
[The quake knocks over several things, and the Power Ring Staff stumble, while Statyx is unfazed]
Fou: *walks up, covered in food* Statyx, the refridgerator fell over again! Should I get the mop?
Silver: *looks through the window* Hey Thunder-dud! Have you electrocuted yourself lately? *laughs*
Statyx: *closes book, puts the book down, gets up. Walks over to the window, and punches Silver in the face. He then closes the window, walks over, sits down, and picks up his book. He continues reading. Without looking at the Power Ring Staff* You learn to live with it.

Episode 15

Statyx: FINALLY!!! It's only taken this idiot about a year to update this!!!
[A rock falls from the sky, and hits Statyx on the head]
Statyx: Ow!! *rubs head, looking up to the sky* What the Hell!?
Be quiet you idiot!! You aren't supposed to break the Fourth Wall!!
Statyx: *puts hands on waist, still looking up at the sky* Not my fault you can't come up with anything better.
[After a long pause, a torrent of water plashes onto Statyx, causing him to electrocute himself]
Statyx: *shakes head, dazed* Now THAT.... was cruel.
[A strong gust of wind blows Statyx down onto his face]
I know.
Statyx: *spits out dirt and water* Why do I have to take this?
Cause I'm your creator and you're the star of this blog.
Statyx: *rolls eyes, tapping a finger on the ground in frustration* Wonderful...
[At that moment, Blaze and Echo walk by in bikinis carrying towels, talking with each other. Statyx notices, and his eyes widen to dinnerplates as they're glued to Blaze and Echo]
Echo: *notices Statyx, then turns to face him* Hey there thunder-dud. Me and Blaze were on our way to the beach.
Blaze: *turns around to Statyx, and smiles* Yeah. Hey, why don't you come with us?
Statyx: ......! *shakes head* But uhhh, I can't swim, remember?
Blaze: *laughs a little* True. Well, you could help us put on our suntan lotion.
Statyx: O_O
Echo: But if you try anything, the consequences will be stuff I don't feel right describing.
Blaze: So, wanna come with us?
Statyx: *scrambles up* Sure!
Blaze: Great! See you there!
[Blaze and Echo head off.]
Statyx: *staring at the two for a while, he clasps his hands together, and looks up to the sky* THANK YOU!!!!
You're welcome.
Statyx: O_o

Episode 16

Statyx: *frustrated groan* I don't want to hear anymore of your jokes!
Leviathan: Why not? They're gold!
Statyx: *rolls eyes* Riiiight, and Silver's my gay lover. O_o *shudders*
Leviathan: Actually, in one of my comics-
[Statyx holds up a hand in Leviathan's face before he can finish.]
Statyx: Before you finish, would you like to know why Omega is frightened of me?
Leviathan: Why a hulking 5 or 7 foot robot filled to the brim with weapons is afraid of a 3 foot hedgehog? Oh I've got to hear this.
Statyx: Because of my powers. As an electrokinetic, I am able to manipulate ferrous material, such as the metal that Omega and you are made of, so I can easily control and otherwise manipulate his and your movements. On top of that, I can easily manipulate Omega's and your entire armamment, which includes blowing it up or setting it off inside of him or you. So there.
Leviathan: ......
Statyx: ......
Leviathan: ......
Statyx: ......
Leviathan: ......
Statyx: ......
Leviathan: ......
Statyx: ......
Leviathan: ....But what does that have to do with the Statilver comic me and Admiral are-
[Later, Admiral is seen holding Leviathan's battered, dented, and severed head.]
Leviathan: After that, it bzzt! goes blank.
Admiral: ....And the data for the comic we were planning?
Leviathan: .......We bzzt! were planning a comic? bzzt!
Admiral: *facepalms* Perfect. Now we've got to photoshop another image and-
[Some knocking is heard at the door of the castle]
Statyx: Admiral~~! I need to speak with yoooou~~!!
Admiral: Mother.
Leviathan: I bzzt! didn't know she was coming for a bzzt! visit.

Episode 17

[Shelly and Statyx are walking together through a park]
Shelly: *breathes in deeply, then exhales, stretching her arms upward* Man, this is a wonderful day!
Statyx: *grumbles* Yeah, great.
Shelly: Oh come on Statyx! You aren't still miffed about that comic those two were gonna make, are you?
Statyx: It was a godforesaken Statilver comic Shelly! Me and Silv-*covers mouth, almost vomitting, then swallows* See? I can't even say it!
Shelly: Yeah. Meanwhile, you trashed their castle inside and out, put Admiral in the ER and a fullbody cast, and all that was left from Leviathan was a microchip!
Statyx: *grumbles* Don't know how I missed that.
Shelly: *rolls eyes* Anyway, can't you let it go?
Statyx: *grumbling*
Shelly: Although, I can't help but wonder who would be the uke, and who would be the seme. *giggles*
Statyx: !!! *twitches*
Shelly: Oh, and I wonder if any foods and fetishes would be involved. *laughs*
[Statyx whips around and grabs Shelly by the neck of her shirt, their faces so close that their noses are touching]
Statyx: Party. Birthday suit. Streak. VIDEO TAPE. *eye twitches*
Shelly: .__. I'll be quiet now.
Statyx: Whaddya know? *lets go* Miracles can happen. *continues walking*
Shelly: I'm just saying...
Statyx: *rolls eyes* I rescind my previous statement.
Shelly: Hmph! Can't you just let it go already!?
Statyx: ......Shadelly, Sonelly, Shellails, Amelly, and Shelise.
Shelly: ....*eye twitches*
Statyx: What were you saying about letting it go?
[At Admiral and Leviathan's castle, a now fully-repaired Leviathan walks into a room where Admiral, sitting in a wheelchair with two broken legs, is drinking a cup of tea]
Admiral: *to himself* Why do I feel that history is going to repeat itself...?
Leviathan: I just finished those comics pimping out Shelly that you wanted!
Admiral: o__o Mother!
Leviathan: Man she's clingy. She just visited, and now she's coming back!

Episode 18

[Statyx, Sonic, Silver, and Shadow are all lounging around. Sonic's laying against a tree, Shadow and Statyx are laying on branches, and Silver's stomach-down on the grass.]
Statyx: *yawns*
Silver: *sighs*
Shadow: .......
Sonic: *tapping his foot incessantly*
[20 minutes later...]
Silver: *snoring*
Shadow: *staring off into space*
Statyx: *blows a leaf off of his nose*
Sonic: *tapping his foot faster, fidgeting a bit and tensing up*
[Another 20 minutes later...]
Silver: *mumbling and drooling in his sleep*
Statyx: *humming a "Into the Night"*
Shadow: *polishing his bracelets*
Sonic: *frustrated expression, tapping his foot faster and fidgeting more*
[5 minutes later, Sonic jumps up]
Sonic: I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!
Statyx: Wahh!! *nearly falls off of the branch, but grabs onto it*
Shadow: *jumps, then looks at Sonic in confusion*
Silver: *suddenly sits upright, awake* Yes Sunny, I'm ready!!
[Sonic, Statyx, and Shadow all look at Silver in surprise]
Silver: *blushing* Um... uhh.... Eheheh... ^^|
Statyx: *climbing back on the branch, he snarls at Silver*
Sonic: ....*shakes head, and groans loudly* I can't take the boredom anymore!! I'm gonna go nuts!!
Shadow: What does that mean?
Sonic: I mean I need something to do!! Robots and monsters to fight!! Plots to ruin!! Life or death situations!!
[Suddenly, Cream, Sally, Amy, Mina, Bunnie, Blaze, and Fiona walk up, the older girls wearing less-than-pleased expressions]
Sonic: *notices the girls* Oh, hey girls! What's up?
Cream: Hey Mr. Sonic! I was going over to your house to invite you for some tea, but something blue out of your bedroom window.
Sonic: *confused* Okay, but why did you bring the others?
Cream: *holds out a porno magazine* This magazine blew out of your window, and showed all of them doing really wierd things with each other.
Sonic: ._.|
Statyx: OwO
Shadow: O.o
Silver: o///o
Cream: When I showed it to them, they said that they wanted you to tell me, but insisted that they come along. So can you please explain what this is Mr. Sonic?
Sally: Yes Sonic, please explain yourself.
Amy: We'd all love to hear it.
Bunnie: Sure 'nough, Sugah.
Fiona: *staring daggers at Sonic*
Blaze: *hands smoking, teeth gritted*
Mina: *blushing heavily, an embarrassed and humiliated expression on her face*
Statyx: *looks at Sonic* Well, you said you wanted a life or death situation.
Sonic: ._.|

Episode 19 (St. Patrick's Day Special)

[Statyx is sitting on a ledge, meditating]
Statyx: .............
[Suddenly, someone pinches Statyx!]
Statyx: !! Ow!! *turns around* Who did that!?
[The person behind him is Sonic, who chuckles]
Sonic: Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Statyx: *growls* Dude! I'm not just wearing green, I am green!!
Sonic: *chuckles*
Statyx: And what about you, mister "Blue Blur"? Where's your green pinch-repellent?
Sonic: *points down, showing that the shoes he's wearing have green buckles*
Statyx: *snorts* Look, I'm trying to meditate. So get out of here before I decide to see how fast you can run when your life's at stake.
Sonic: Heheh, alright, alright. Later dude! *runs off*
Statyx: Hmph. Gonna celebrate a holiday, follow the rules. *turns back around and resumes meditating*
[About 10 minutes later, Statyx is meditating, when someone pinches him again]
Statyx: Yeow!! *gets up and turns around, growling angrily*
[The one standing there now is Cream, smiling]
Statyx: Cream!? What was that for!?
Cream: *giggles* I wanted to ask you where Fou was. Since it's St. Patrick's Day, I thought it would be funny to pinch you ^v^
Statyx: *exhasperated sigh* He's back at my place, playing video games. So, where's your green today?
Cream: *holds up her green tie*
Statyx: *sighs* Alright. Now Cream, I'm trying to meditate, so please don't do that again, okay?
Cream: *giggles* Okay Mr. Statyx. Bye! *runs off*
Statyx: *groans* If someone pinches me again today, I'm gonna lose it...
[Statyx turns around again, about to sit down, when someone pinches his butt]
Statyx: *jumps, then starts shaking with anger, he whips around* ALRIGHT, WHO'S THE SMART-@$$ WHO THINKS IT'S FUNNY TO-
[The person standing there is Blaze, who's wearing a green version of her coat.]
Blaze: Heheh ^_~
Statyx: o////o

Episode 20

[Statyx is walking down the street, reading a small card in his hand.]
Statyx: A reunion at the convention center, huh? Sounds good: I haven't seen Shelly or Mystic in a while. *chuckles* I need to pull out some fresh jokes. Wouldn't want all that self-defense training to go to waist.
[A short while later, Statyx is walking through the convention center, looking for the correct room.]
Statyx: Lesse..... S-1, S-2... Ah! S-3! Here we go! *walks up to the door and pushes it open* Hello ladies and gentlemen! The one and only Statyx has ar-
[Statyx sees before him a large amount of familiar yet unfamiliar faces. Many of them look like people he knows, yet they have different colors, while some have additional or slightly altered features.]
Statyx: *eyes wide, jaw dropped* ..........WHO ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE!?!?!?!